Twelfth Post!

[hoisinsauce]

POST NAMER TBC-- work harder, meme!

Welcome back, anyway! Chat fandom, media, creative things, weirdness from around the net, funny stuff, anything! Meme awaits!

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Comments

Re: Books - Spare (Prince Harry)

[(Anonymous)]

Some other misc that I didn't write up:

* The army trying to keep Harry busy with nonsense tasks is pretty funny. You know how Maggie drives the car in the opening of The Simpsons? His military career comes across like that.

* Meghan Markle can apparently talk to seals, and this causes the seals to stage an "opera", just for her and Harry. The book notes that, by trying to sing to the seals, she may have lured the seals to their deaths, then glides past it, suggesting that the seal opera helped her get pregnant with magic.

* Everyone loses their shit over wedding seating arrangements. And outfits. And beards.

* Harry is suspiciously keen to note that Meghan did NOT suffer morning sickness, and was a "dynamo". This feels like a really weird dig at Kate Middleton, to this nonny; pretty much the only thing I know about her is that she had a really bad time with morning sickness.

* Harry tells a deeply unconvincing story about William suddenly launching a physical attack on him out of nowhere, and smashing him into a ceramic dog bowl. Read like darvo to this nonny.

* All the courtiers are randomly mean to Harry and Meghan for no reason and then the family believe the mean things the courtiers say for no reason and it's all a terrible injustice, damn those servants.

* Harry keeps going Gavin Belson with different animals, having Significant moments of connection with them, sometimes bordering on telepathy. They are often messengers, meant for him. A leopard, a fox, some bulls, a hummingbird, a dog, an elephant, some seals. It is suggested by someone that, despite being British, he has a ~wild African heart~.

* In general, he treats Africa like a resort/spa that he pops into whenever he wants to chillax. He seems unaware that a) most people can't do this and b) this comes across as crass.

* Surprisingly good chapter on the horrors of poaching.

* His wife goes into labour; he sits there eating nandos, uses up all her nitrous oxide before she can have any, and then earnestly instructs her to "push".

Re: Books - Spare (Prince Harry)

[(Anonymous)]

And again: this is the book that he put out in an attempt to make himself look good. We've been joking all day about Charles slipping the ghostwriter a twenty.

Re: Books - Spare (Prince Harry)

[(Anonymous)]

Another thing I forgot to mention: Harry constantly complains about unflattering press coverage of himself, but also acts like it's unprecedented. He shows nothing but antipathy toward Camilla, for example, casting her as the ultimate villain of the book. But the press was *much* more vicious to her, over the years, even suggesting that she had had Harry's mother *murdered*.

Meanwhile, Harry's furious about being referred to as a Hooray Henry. Never mind that he *is* a Hooray Henry! His name is even *literally* Henry!

(Mentioned this to friend. "Huh? What's a hooray henry?" "Er... Basically a guy like him. Posh, terrible." "Oh, okay.")

Anyway yeah this book is slightly fascinating because you really do get a glimpse into what Henry VIII would be like if you teleported him over to the present day. Harry even complains, at one point, that royals are not perceived as divine any more. He was born to hunt and joust and fuck around, stropping all the while. He gives the impression he very much wishes he could behead all detractors and control the press. He hates books and book learnin' and Shakespeare and theatre and history; he wants to run and shoot things and jetski in natural beauty spots, and he wants everyone else to pay for it. And to agree that He Is The Best.

Fascinating document.

Re: Books - Spare (Prince Harry)

[(Anonymous)]

>Meghan Markle can apparently talk to seals, and this causes the seals to stage an "opera", just for her and Harry. The book notes that, by trying to sing to the seals, she may have lured the seals to their deaths, then glides past it, suggesting that the seal opera helped her get pregnant with magic.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=1LdjVtHqNxs

Re: Books - Spare (Prince Harry)

[(Anonymous)]

> The army trying to keep Harry busy with nonsense tasks is pretty funny.

My vague memory from the newscycle at the time is that they initially managed to give him proper work to do under a pseudonym, which he was pretty okay at and loved, and then the media found out so that all went away. I would assume the point would have been to make any media hay with it later, but that also there was a genuine concerted effort to give him and William some space to grow up and be relatively normal.

But this is from memory, and it’s very difficult to look anything up now without it just being about what people think now, plus I am not that interested.

Re: Books - Spare (Prince Harry)

[(Anonymous)]

He presents it this way, but the details of what he actually does read like "keep him busy" tasks, and he trains to pilot a helicopter and then... never pilots it. It's sus. But yeah, I was reading between the lines; he never overtly says that they were just keeping him busy.

Re: Books - Spare (Prince Harry)

[(Anonymous)]

Like, one of his jobs is to look at a big bank of security monitors, just in case something happens. So he's spending hours just sitting in the base, watching a screen, having been told it's very important. He also has some kind of job involving taking notes of other people's radio calls (which is how he finds out he's getting pulled out). And he's using some kind of computer thing that none of the other men doing the job seem to be using. I think they gave him a toy one. He has the job of telling men if they're cleared to fly above the base, but doesn't seem to do any scheduling or anything, so wouldn't be surprised if he were being shadowed the whole time (or if he was basically the shadow xD).